Live 2 Learn

I grew up in Magnolia, Mississippi and I wasn't aware as a child but I was spoiled.  The third child, the baby, and the only boy.  My father's father had been the only son in his family of 10 kids so the continuation of the Gardner name fell on his shoulders.  My father had three brothers and two sisters but one of his brothers, Uncle Paul never had children, one of his brothers Uncle Preacher had three girls and his baby brother, Uncle Roy had two boys.  We three boys now owned that burden of carrying on the name so we got special treatment and besides, we were growing up in the fifties when all males were enjoying a lot of male privileges. When I think back on my childhood a certain birthday present stands out as illustrative of my treatment in the family. Eight years old I remember vividly riding in the middle of the front seat of our car. I was sitting on the lowered armrest between Mother and Daddy with my sisters Joy and Jinya Lea in the bac...

 Summer after 4th grade, I was a Cub Scout and four of us were chosen to sit at the Pike Theatre in uniform all day on Saturday to collect money for the Will Rogers Institute.  Right after the previews, a film about the Will Rogers Institute would play followed by the lights coming up and our walking around with buckets to collect donations. Aunt Alice Gwin managed the theater - she wasn't really my aunt but the aunt of my cousin so we all called her "Aunt Alice." We decided to camp out in my log cabin that night.  My log cabin was a birthday gift to which I devoted an entire Blog . Teddy, Dan, and Bob joined me in this adventure (their names have been changed for reasons that will become clear later). The night started in a pretty standard fashion with everyone telling ghost stories.  There were the standards - the hook, about a parking couple hearing a radio story in which an escaped murderer had a hook for a right hand.  After hearing a noise they d...

Summer 1960, I was eight years old when my Father decided to take me to his fishing camp at Lake Mary, Mississippi. I guess he couldn’t get any of his friends to go with him that weekend because he ended up with Mr. Bill Lacy who was eighty and me in a boat fishing for white perch. I vaguely remember spending the night in the exotic camp – well exotic to an 8-year-old – and how cool it was to be “roughing it.” The camp had been built on stilts to protect it from periodic floods but years before after the floods were controlled a “ground floor” was added. The camp had all the comforts of home – more-or-less. The three of us must have made quite a sight on the Lake that Saturday morning. Mr. Bill was a little shaky and so Daddy had to bait his hook for him. I was squeamish about touching the live minnows we used for bait. Since my “weak stomach” was well known by then it only took a couple of loud gags to convince Daddy that he should bait my hooks also! The fish were biting like cra...

In 2014, the woman who helped raise me, Mrs. Auline Scott died and was buried in Pike County, Mississippi.  I was honored to be one of her pall bearers at the funeral and then even more highly honored when the local paper asked me to write a tribute for Black History Month because they had chosen her to be the person in the spotlight.  A year later I still grieve her loss as do her children and frankly anyone who knew her.  I posted a photo of us when I was about two years old and it got more likes than any other Facebook post I've done - not because of me but because of so many people affirming her power in their lives.  I was asked to reproduce the article I wrote and it follows below the photos... Black History Month – Auline Scott Bill Gardner Black History Month according to Wikipedia is, “an annual observance for remembrance of important people and events in the history of the African diaspora.”   Traditionally this newspaper...

On September 24, 2013 in San Jose, California, a Deputy County Commissioner for Santa Clara County named Loune Philavane said, "By the authority vested in me by the State of California, I now pronounce you legally married spouses."  We stood on the opposite side of a Plexiglas divider with a circular arrangement of holes at head level to allow us to hear MS Philavane when she spoke the vows we repeated.  People were all over the place in the Courthouse at windows just like ours getting copies of their birth certificates, or copies of some family member's death certificates or like us, getting married.  How did we get here and why such a pedestrian setting for what is typically reserved for much pomp and circumstance, and why were we alone with no friends or family to witness our nuptials? We're Gay, that's why.  We live in Texas.   Texas citizens decided several years ago (80% to 20%) that our relationship has "no standing" and that the State and non...

Carroll Case (a renowned Mississippi artist & author) posted a request on Facebook for people's memories of the day President Kennedy was assassinated. "I am working on a project and need your help. PLEASE send me an e-mail at carrollcaseart@gmail.com and tell me where you were when you heard about the assassination of President Kennedy. If you were not born before 1963, please relate what your parents told you about where they were. Thanks!" Since this year is the 50th Anniversary of the assassination I thought he might be putting a book together with some people's stories and his illustrations. After sending my story he posted: "OK so your wondering why I wanted your Kennedy memories.....let me just say this Mark your calendar for November 22 Friday 7pm at the store front theatre , State street, mcComb ms. For an event you will not soon forget. Lots more info to follow.....cc" I can't imagine what he is up to but I am going to try to t...

First posted on 12/17/2012. Edited and expanded based on feedback from readers and friends and re-posted. Illusion III and Illusion IX suggested by readers. Use of HTML feedback also implemented. As I've read through all the Facebook posts about Newtown, I have become more-and-more depressed about our capability as a country, as a people, to learn from what happened. I also do not believe that anything will happen to prevent the next tragedy. I am not a pessimist, actually I tend to be overly optimistic but we have a number of illusions that we hold to the point of being National Learning Disabilities. These illusions will prohibit true learning and true action from taking place. All of the Learning Disabilities result from illusions that we have embraced and hold so dearly that so far nothing – not facts, not data, not experience, not logic, not science, not religion; NOTHING has shaken our beliefs in these nine fallacious illusions. I will not talk down to anyone or “pr...